Self-talk is not simply talking to yourself about the mental list of what you need to accomplish for the day; it also refers to the actual things you say and the tone in which you say them. It goes beyond talking to yourself, to that of identifying the type of self-talk, whether it’s positive or negative.
People oftentimes do negative self-talk without them knowing it. They scold themselves angrily upon making mistakes. They call themselves through derogatory names, which, unknowingly to them, can damage their self-esteem. They put it in their heads that they are worthless and that they can never do anything right. This is negative self-talk. You should kick off the habit of negative self-talk. If you continue to do it, chances are, you are going to believe them and eventually, you might turn into that negative person you molded yourself to be.
These negative things you say to yourself usually starts during your childhood, when adults in your childhood life would say something negative or unkind about you. These are hurtful words and experiences, and unless you stop telling them repeatedly to yourself, you will forever be buried into this negative self-talk cycle. Stop this negative self-talk now and try these simple tips for a start:
1. Be more aware when doing self-talk. Keep listening to yourself. It takes patience to totally do away with negative self-talk, but it pays to be patient. Once you’re listening to yourself, you’ll be able to “catch yourself” when you’re saying negative things.
2. Question the negative talk. When you hear yourself starting to self-talk negatively, stop and question those negative things. Do you really make more mistakes than other people? Stop calling yourself derogatory names. Anyway, it’s not all the time that you make those mistakes. Remember to focus on your strengths.
3. Change those negative messages into positive ones. When you notice that you are starting to say unkind and untrue things to yourself, immediately change them to positive messages. Remember that positive messages can empower you. It only takes a little effort from you to enjoy promising rewards such as higher self-esteem, stronger self-respect, and a sense of confidence in your capabilities. This won’t happen with a snap of a finger, but the harder you try to turn your self-talk into an empowering talk, the more confident you will become.
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